DARK PHASE OF A DREAMER

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I am a dreamer.

Yes you heard a right sentence, I am dreaming since the day I was born. There are many phases in my life where I like to think about dream but I can’t as dreaming is in my blood. When I was a child, I was dreaming to walk on my foot and want  to experience the things what I cannot. When I was a boy, I was dreaming about chocolates, cycling, and fantasies. When I was in my youth, I was dreaming about love, romance, career, growth, and fun. When I was in my 30’s, I was dreaming about cars, parties, flats and everything that connects to a cool lifestyle. When I was in my 40’s, I was dreaming about my family planning, my income sources and my lifestyle. When I was in my 50’s I was dreaming about my retirement and life after it.

The day I stopped dreaming is today when I know everything that I was dreaming was merely a lollypop to live this life happily. Someday I think when I am in my corner to look my past and I found that I was alone in my whole journey with my dreams. Someday I look on the mirror to find the dreams in my eyes but it looks empty. Someday I think to calculate my earnings of the life and find nothing but my flesh with some blood to run a life. Someday when I calculate the days I reached to my dreams, I find a big zero.

The days were passed in my life like a silent film, where everything was running without the music. It was the life I lived like everybody did and I am finding me in same corner as everybody else. The life I was dreaming was nothing but an image of illusion. Had I taken some steps back in my 20’s, life was never being like this. At every junction I was adjusting with the environment but never tried to change it.



I could have chosen my work in my youth that I like to do rest of my life. I could approach my crush to propose my love. I could do everything that I was dreaming about. I could live the city where I always wanted to be and couldn’t just because of my dreams. It is good to dream but if I would have lived my life as I wanted to live then everything would be a fun. I always wanted to teach the poor but couldn’t just because of my silly job, if I would had done that then my soul is not regretting for it now. I always wanted to travel for peace but couldn’t just because of thinking about a right time, if I would had done that my legs are not asking questions right now.

I was always capable of doing everything in my life but I had taken my steps back just because I was dreaming about it. It was my life but I was living it in my dreams. If I would have implemented everything then my life would be more awesome then I dream about it now.



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